Too Loud? Good. I Was Never Meant to Be Quiet.

“Too Loud? Good. I Was Never Meant to Be Quiet.”

By Tumalo Noel Zakaria 

They say the world is loud—but they never warn you how quiet they expect women to be.

Growing up, I learned that being soft-spoken made you “ladylike,” and being outspoken made you “difficult.” For the longest time, I tried to play small, to blend in, to be the version of myself that didn’t ruffle feathers. But eventually, something in me woke up—and once I started speaking, I couldn’t un-hear the power in my own voice.

🔹 What It Means to Be a Vocal Woman

Being a woman with a voice means entering rooms that weren’t built for you—and refusing to whisper. It’s about making your thoughts known even when the room goes quiet. It’s about understanding that you don’t have to soften your tone for the sake of someone else’s comfort.

And yes, it’s also about carrying the weight of labels: too much, too loud, too emotional.

But I’ve learned those words aren’t really about me. They’re warnings. Warnings that I’m shaking something. That I’m choosing to take up space in a world that would rather I didn’t.

🔹 The Double Standards We Face

When a man is assertive, he’s “confident.” When a woman is assertive, she’s “aggressive.” When a man leads, it’s leadership. When a woman leads, it’s questioned.

I see these patterns every day—in classrooms, in the media industry, even in casual conversations. And I’ve felt the pressure to dim my light just to keep the peace. But peace built on silence isn’t peace—it’s erasure.

So I speak. I ask. I challenge. I own the discomfort of being “too loud,” because that’s where truth lives.

🔹 Why I Keep Speaking

I use my voice for the girl I used to be—the one who kept quiet to avoid being judged. I speak for the women who still feel invisible. I speak because I can, and that itself is a privilege. But more than anything, I speak because I have something to say—and so do millions of other women, waiting for space to say it.

If my words can crack the silence, even just a little, then I know I’m doing something right.

🔸 Closing:

So the next time someone tells me I’m too much, I’ll smile. Because yes—I am. And I was never meant to be anything less.

“Your silence will not protect you.” — Audre Lorde

💭 What about you? Have you ever felt pressure to stay quiet? Drop a comment and let’s keep this conversation going.